ihateweddings.com

Looking For Wedding War Stories

Fri, 2 Dec 2011 15:59:18 -0400

HIT NATIONAL TV TALK SHOW IS LOOKING FOR WEDDING WAR STORIES. DID A BRIDE, GROOM, FAMILY MEMBER OR FRIEND DO OR SAY SOMETHING SO OUTRAGEOUS AT YOUR WEDDING THAT IT HAS FOREVER RUINED OR CHANGED YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THAT PERSON?

DID YOUR HUSBAND, WIFE, FAMILY MEMBER OR FRIEND:

- GET WAY TOO DRUNK OR HIGH?
- OFFEND YOUR FAMILY?
- FOOL AROUND WITH SOMEONE THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE?
- LEAVE YOU AT THE ALTAR OR OTHERWISE GO AWOL?
- IN SOME WAY MAKE A FOOL OF HIM/HERSELF?

*WE'LL ALSO CONSIDER COMPLAINTS AGAINST TERRIBLE PHOTOGRAPHERS, WEDDING PLANNERS, VIDEOGRAPHERS, FLORISTS, ETC.!**

IF YOU WANT TO CONFRONT YOUR SPOUSE, FAMILY MEMBER OR FRIEND FOR TURNING YOUR DREAM WEDDING INTO A NIGHTMARE, COME ON OUR SHOW AND TELL US ABOUT IT SO WE CAN HELP YOU PUT SOME CLOSURE ON A BIG DAY THAT WENT BUST!

PLEASE CONTACT US ASAP AT rgoldman@billcunninghamshow.comWITH YOUR NAME AND #, OR BY CALLING US TOLL FREE AT 855-833-7770, EXT. 2!

THIS IS FOR A TAPING IN NEW YORK CITY ON THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8! OUT-OF-TOWN GUESTS TRAVEL WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 7!

***ALL NON-NYC GUESTS GET FREE FLIGHT, HOTEL, AND $50+!**

The Best Of IHateWeddings.com

Sun, 27 Nov 2011 06:31:00 -0400

Some of you have left fan mail.� Some of you have left hate mail.� As I continue to fill the site with more content, I decided to create a quick archive of my favorite I Hate Weddings.com articles and the ones that have generated the most controversy.

Wedding haters unite!

Send us your stories and send me fan and hate mail at ThisShowAgain@gmail.com

Thomas J. Kelly
Stand Up Comedian and Creator Of IHateWeddings.com

My Favorite Articles Of All Time
Wedding Gift Calculator
The Morals Of IHateWeddings.com
Why We Shouldn't Give Wedding Gifts
Sunday Night Weddings Are Evil
Passive Aggressive Way To Taunt A Bride
July Fourth Weddings Stink
Thank You Card Etiquette

Some Of Tom's Other Projects And Links
Tom's Web Radio Show This Show Again.com
Tom's TV Show About Becoming A Male Mermaid
Tom's You Tube Page With Other Non Wedding Funny Videos
Tom's Twitter

Tom's Email: ThisShowAgain@gmail.com

Stand By Wedding Guest

Tue, 21 Jun 2011 17:24:40 -0300

We�ve all heard of A list wedding guests . . . the friends and family you definitely have to invite to a wedding. Then you have B list wedding guests, the friends you love and they barely made the cut. Tom Kelly has invented a new class of wedding guests: Standby Wedding Guests.
We�ve all heard of A list wedding guests . . . the friends and family you definitely have to invite to a wedding. Then you have B list wedding guests, the friends you love and they barely made the cut.

Then you have the C list wedding guests. That would be coworkers and people who get invited very last minute. They wind up at the �freak table.�

Now we all know there is nothing sadder than having empty seats at your wedding. You need your guests who RSVP yes to actually show up.

How do you prevent unsightly empty seats? Standby wedding guests. These guests are your casual friends who you�d like to invite but can�t. These guests are your lower income casual friends, people who�d like a free steak and probably don�t have plans.

Stand by guests would come to the wedding. And be high end seat fillers. But unlike seat fillers, these are people you know who�d you like to come to your wedding. You just aren�t sure if you had room.

For example my friends Amy and Arnold wanted to invite me to their wedding. But they didn�t think they�d have enough room. It turned out they had 12 people not show up for the wedding. They had 12 empty seats. That made it look like they didn�t have 200 friends.

Now Standby wedding guests are different than �Wedding Crashers.� If they don�t get a seat, these people are nice enough to go home without making a scene.

The perks of being a standby wedding guest: The bride gets the comfort of knowing she won�t have empty seats at her wedding. The stand by wedding guest doesn�t� have to buy a gift.

Unmarried Sibling�s Sister Wedding

Wed, 20 Apr 2011 23:32:00 -0300

Here is another e-mail from and I hate weddings.com reader:

I am currently trying to plan my wedding. I am in a tough spot.

On the weekend in April 2012 when I want to get married, my brother's birthday is on Saturday. I know having a wedding on an unmarried sibling's birthday is the ultimate thunderstealing.

So which is worse, getting married on a sibling's birthday or getting married on a Sunday? I'm guessing I'll have to choose the Sunday to get married.

Signed,
Erica T.

How about this? If you're planning that far away why not pick May 2012? That'll make your single sibling less suicidal. Don't be a thunder stealing douche bag.

Who Should Call?

Sun, 10 Apr 2011 23:28:14 -0300

IHateWeddings.com creator Tom Kelly answers an e-mail from a reader:

I need to know if I should of called my sister after she walked out of my daughter's wedding. No explanation, nothing.

We went to sit down and I was told that she left with her son, (who is 26) The next day I hosted a brunch, at the hotel for guests that were staying.

She keeps telling my mom that etiquette says, I should have called, to find out why she left.

I feel that she should tell me why she left. It was very hurtful, and expensive paying for two dinners that were not eaten. That is besides the point.

I need to settle this. Thanks.

Signed,
Mrs. J
First, I want to apologize for not answering sooner. The comments section on this blog gets clogged up with spam mail. It took forever for me to sort through six months worth of fan mail, hate mail, questions, and spam.

I wanted to make a point of answering your e-mail quickly. Now, normally this is a comedic blog where I give tongue-in-cheek responses to normal etiquette questions concerning weddings. I feel like you need an honest and straightforward response.

The bottom-line is your both right and you're both wrong.

For the most part, I'm going to take your side in this argument because you have good taste in wedding etiquette blogs. I'm

Amongst the many things I hate about weddings are the etiquette and the scorekeeping. Yes, she should have called you after walking out on one of the most special days of your life. But what if it was important? What if the kid had a kidney stone?

The bottom line is it seems like your sister is a drama queen who couldn't handle the spotlight being on somebody else for a day. It seemed like she managed to take an event that was about somebody else ( her niece) and turn it into something that is about her (fighting with you).

So here's the question: what's more important being right or your relationship with your drama queen sister?

Even though she should have called to tell you why she walked out, even though you had bigger things to worry about that weekend� I think you could've picked up the phone after the wedding weekend was over.

The bottom line is if your sister has time to be upset that you didn't call during your daughter's wedding weekend, whatever reason she left probably wasn't that important.

But what is the price of being right? Never talking to your sister again?

So here's my advice: forget about it.

Give the crazy old bag a phone call. Show some interest in her petty little problems. Go on with your life. Life is too short for scorekeeping. (Even though I think you're the one who deserves a point in her column).

Sent Them A Bill

Sun, 10 Apr 2011 22:35:12 -0300

My friend "Bob" had someone RSVP to his wedding. They did not show up for the wedding. He and his wife sent them a bill for their plate. What do you think of this?

Help Me With My Wedding Invite

Sun, 6 Dec 2009 20:59:24 -0400

This I Hate Weddings.com reader needs help writing her invite. She wrote me a note asking for help:

�My problem isn't my parents. They are the one thing normal. This is my second marriage and I kept [my ex�s] last name. Many people don't even recognize my [maiden] name as me. So what or how do I write all that. My fiance�s mother passed away last year, so how do you honor her memory in the invitation? Also his ex-stepmother (divorced) will be there. My fiance is mostly paying for the wedding. My parents and I are chipping in.

Her question was originally posted on this Article: Invitation Nation.
Help Her With A Wedding Invite
This I Hate Weddings.com reader needs help writing her invite. She wrote me a note asking for help:

�My problem isn't my parents. They are the one thing normal. This is my second marriage and I kept [my ex�s] last name. Many people don't even recognize my [maiden] name as me. So what or how do I write all that. My fiance�s mother passed away last year, so how do you honor her memory in the invitation? Also his ex-stepmother (divorced) will be there. My fiance is mostly paying for the wedding. My parents and I are chipping in.

My answer: �Jane Smith daughter of Rich and Elaine Maiden Name . . . and Richard Jones son of Father and Mother request the honor of your presence at their wedding.� The ex-stepmother does not get a mention on the invite even though we all love her.

Here are what some of my Facebook friends thought of your problem:

"Me and him invite you to share in our wedding day nuptials... blah blah blah. Leave out everyone else no matter who is paying. No one cares anyway." - Aimee A.

""I'd probably not honor the deceased on a Wedding invitation, but I'd write this:
Fiance X and Bride, who was married before, along with his Dad, step-Mom, and her Parents, who are chipping in, invite you to attend their wedding. BYOB." - Jennifer C.

""We have experienced love... in our parents, our families and friends and now a new love in each other. Together with our parents, we Bride's name and Groom's name invite you to share with us a celebration of love. The ceremony will be held at yada yada etc." - Alisha S.

"You write... I think I still love my ex so I will honor him by keeping his last name. As for his mother, who was sweet, compassionate and caring I dedicate my new vows to her." - Erik T.

"It's the fiance's ex-step-mom...maybe he had a great relationship w/her...maybe his dad is the douche" - Katie N.

"Mothers from a prior relationship should not be there at ALL!!" - Erik T.

"Since you have been married before ... You are no longer a virgin and should live in isolation and shame." - Craig C.

"Clearly this should be a Vegas wedding." - Skippy

"I say call the whole thing off. Way to much bs to deal with already and this is just the invitation. She'll probably be divorced in a year anyway. So dump the guy, get a make over, go back to hangin out in bars and pick up some young guy and do things you always wanted to do but were afraid how your fiance would react. Then if you still wanna get married, get back with your ex cause you obviously still love him." - Skippy

Her question was originally posted on this Article: Invitation Nation.

Tom Kelly Crashes A Wedding

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 00:30:30 -0400

Tom Kelly talks about one reason why men should crash weddings. Then shows a clip of himself actually crashing a wedding.

Tom Kelly talks about one reason why men should crash weddings. Then shows a clip of himself actually crashing a wedding.

Getting Married On A Sibling's Birthday

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 22:48:16 -0300

Here is an email from an IHateWeddings.com reader: �What happens when you sacrifice your birthday so your brother can celebrate his anniversary every year on your birthday? I find that a stab in the back.�

We talk about Thunderstealing a lot at IHateWeddings.com. This is the ultimate case of Thunderstealing. This is a moment of Thunderstealing that is a lifetime in the making.

Here is a new IHateWeddings.com rule: You are not allowed to get married on your unmarried siblings� birthdays. Especially if it looks like your unmarried sibling will never get married. That means for the rest of your life your spinster sister�s special day will be overshadowed by your anniversary.

And don�t pray for your brother to get divorced. Then instead of your birthday and his anniversary being the happiest day of your brother�s life, it will be the worst day of his life.

While your family is singing you �Happy Birthday� they�ll secretly be feeling bad for your divorced brother.

What's your opinion? We'd like to know?
Here is an email from an IHateWeddings.com reader: �What happens when you sacrifice your birthday so your brother can celebrate his anniversary every year on your birthday? I find that a stab in the back.�

We talk about Thunderstealing a lot at IHateWeddings.com. This is the ultimate case of Thunderstealing. This is a moment of Thunderstealing that is a lifetime in the making.

Here is a new IHateWeddings.com rule: You are not allowed to get married on your unmarried siblings� birthdays. Especially if it looks like your unmarried sibling will never get married. That means for the rest of your life your spinster sister�s special day will be overshadowed by your anniversary.

And don�t pray for your brother to get divorced. Then instead of your birthday and his anniversary being the happiest day of your brother�s life, it will be the worst day of his life.

While your family is singing you �Happy Birthday� they�ll secretly be feeling bad for your divorced brother.

Girl With No Pants

Sun, 4 Oct 2009 13:16:55 -0300

While at a bachelor party in Atlantic City, Thomas J. Kelly gets into the back of a car and encounters a girl with no pants.

(If you like it be sure to give me a funny vote. . . if you really like it . . .be sure to spread it around).

Girl With No Pants - watch more funny videos